My career?

I had always wanted to work in the media and become an entertainer. And then I thought—What am I doing in a science faculty?

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When I was young, I’d thought success was something different. I’d thought, when I would grow up I would become famous, I would become a star, be in movies, have nice cars. But, as you grow up, the definition of success changes. For many of us, today’s success is to hold down 20 shots of tequila. Then I learned you have to go to college and study to become successful.  After all, I need to achieve my aim.

That is when I joined St Xavier’s College taking science as my majors. Oh God!  I’d thought this college would be filled with nerds and you have to come forward in everything dedicating your entire life to study. It was even worse; this place was crawling with nerds. One day, I went to the library and saw people actually reading books. This was discrepant from what we did in our school. For us going to library was just like visiting a park where you can actually talk to your friends. But No! I realised here, people literally study.

I had always wanted to work in the media and become an entertainer. And then I thought—What am I doing in a science faculty? If I wanted to work in the media then shouldn’t I be taking arts as my major? How did I end up studying to become an engineer? These were the questions I started thinking about after a few months of college. That is when I realised—you don’t choose life but life chooses you. Things never end up the way we want them to. Otherwise, people in my country would have reached the land of fantasy where no one had reached before.
Life is not as easy as it seems to be. I remember myself dancing since I started to walk. And I never thought dance could take me to this extreme. Now, music has become my body’s best friend and I deluge with it. I thought I could become a great dancer someday and spread the joy of dancing to the world. However, that dream of mine didn’t last long. After watching reality dance shows like So You Think You Can Dance and Dance India Dance my heart became heavy as I learned that you have to take dance lessons and dedicate your whole life to dancing to fulfil your dream. But then again, a place where I am born is where there is no scope even though you have got the talent for it. But, this fact didn’t stop me from dancing. Now, I dance more than ever.

My dad wants me to become an electrical engineer but he never forced me to study for that. He always says, “Do whatever you like but be good at it.” I never wanted to study science but I did. Life is an unusual abode where you have to do the things you don’t want to.

People are going to talk whether you do bad or good. And I gathered a lot of courage to perform belly dance being a male. Many people praised and many didn’t. This might be unusual for others but for me it’s something I do every time I see myself in the mirror. But that doesn’t mean I have to become a belly dancer. It’s up to me to decide. And this is another question mark in my career. Being a teenager and figuring out who you are is hard enough without someone attacking you? On top of that, there are lots of question marks over the career we choose. Does it mean we should do as we are told? Or hide the things we want to do? It depends on who you are and what you are going to do. I don’t know if I will become an entertainer or an electrical engineer or a social worker fighting for gender inequality, but I have decided I will do what I please, without causing any harm to others.

source: Shahi, Rajiv (2013),"My career?", The Kathmandu Post,27 March 2013

Rajiv Shahi
Class: A Levels
St Xaviers College

2013-03-27 | EducateNepal


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